You look flushed! Maybe she wont hear me if I turn on the water. WebHeard the person who invented the urinals was very young. What does a man desperate to urinate do in a room full of arrogant people? I hate spelling errors. Jokes are funny when you understand them. 100. Our child has a great deal of willpowerand even more wont power. 2. 3. 46. Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl using the bathroom? "Hi my name is Charmin and you must be the shit 'cause I want you all over me." It became a problem because it kills the flowers. A guy with explosive diarrhea was eager to tell a joke. Did you hear about the sequel, Diarrhea? Its funny just saying it. 5. 'Cause it's just like rain with a little thunder. Q. Poo-thirty. What did one DNA say to the other DNA? Q. Love sharing with your friends and family? Pee, therefore queue. Whats happened Paddy?" Did you hear about the constipated accountant? What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Interviewer to job applicant: Can you come up with any reason you want this job other than your parents want you out of the house?. The frat boys thought about it and one shouted out,"I wish What do you call a bear with no teeth? I have a hard time getting it out. Q. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. We've been through a lot of shit together. 'Cause he was already scared stiff! He then says,alright last chance. What happens if you fall into the toilet? the nurse who was chewed out by the doctor because she was absent without gauze? Nowadays, poop has already been normalized. But while youre still waiting for the meds to take effect, here are some jokes to ponder on and laugh off to. Police were called to a sperm bank yesterday, after the receptionist was reportedly shot in the face. We cant even get enough of the poop emoji because its disgustingly cute. The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office and the man there says,So weve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Why arent dogs good dancers? She leaves me with the feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot. A real rip-off. Advice to husbands: Try praising your wife now and then, even if it does startle her at first. 21. Required fields are marked *. The man says I'll let you get your money back or even more, I bet you 7,500$ I can bite my right eye. Probably 40 of the little suckers. They both deal with a lot of crap. He didnt finish the last movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation? 5. 4. Do these genes make me look fat? 3. What happens when you miss the toilet bowl? It was clogged. What did one DNA say to the other DNA? It got stuck in the crack! What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song? Well, urine luck! Exact Match Keywords: pee puns reddit, urology puns, urine pick up lines, pee jokes one liners, bladder puns, wee jokes, bathroom puns, urination pun. Cops have nothing to go on. What do you call a fairy that uses the toilet? The nurse at the sperm bank told a guy to masturbate in the cup. Dung-arees. WebThe man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. Why did the baby put quarters in its diaper? We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. They smell funny. I hate spelling errors. It leaked so they had to release it early. If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? What happens to an illegally parked frog? Urine it to win it? If H20 is in the inside of a fire hydrant, what's on the outside ? You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. A. Airport security wouldnt let it through. Because that's where all the cocks hang out. He couldnt hold it in. Where's the p, How can you tell youre getting old? Do these genes make me look fat? 3. To get to the bottom! What do snow and friends have in common? A joke does not have to be long, to be funny. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. 11. Knock, knock. 1. Because it's all about number one. Which kind of dinosaur suffered from incontinence? Put a bit more formally: Ctrl+P Something is in the air and we dont like it. 3. 59. Why is sperm white and urine yellow? Why did the basketball player go to the bathroom? A. It runs in your genes. He never reads any of mine. 7. He tells his family and his sister doesn't believe it. The receptionist asked me to pee in a cup, I told her that I didn't think I would be able to since I just peed before my visit. Ctrl+P What do you get when blind guy tries to talk to you at a urinal? Who wants to know? 58. They didnt all bring their wallets, so I ended up paying the lions share. 53. A hardened criminal. Yeah, they got him on possession. Yeah, they got him on possession. Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. A tee-totaler. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. I just hate when theyre too corny or run on. A. The man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. The volcano exploded because it couldnt find a lava-tory. Whats the definition of surprise? He was a whiz kid. Family Game: Do you really know your Family? 80. What did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet? Some men say they dont wear their wedding band because it cuts off circulation. Whos there? Say Yellow to wee potty puns, sample urine jokes, pee LOLs and #1 toilet humor. One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. The other day I called in sick with diarrhea. I am Julia, I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh. Advertisement. I was sitting inside the mall but outside the shop waiting and wishing I was dead. We recommend our users to update the browser. Knock, knock. 82. A. She was sitting in the car at the mall while her mother shopped. Did you hear about the constipated movie? He never reads any of mine. Captain Hooky. I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly?" Funny one-liners. Advertisement. To look for Pooh! I pleaded, "no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically." To make it to the bottom! Because the p is silent. You might get the I dont get it from your kids. Daughter: How much longer, I have to pee. 2. Pee Point to Ponder: Do funny urine jokes piss you off? Urine Jokes, Funny Pee Puns, Urologist Humor (Because Mellow Yellow Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream and Pee Puns May Make You Go with the Flow!) Whats big and brown and behind the wall? A. A noble gas. We hope you enjoyed all these funny jokes because we sure did! One pricks your finger and the other fingers your prick. Poop-corn! I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! With age comes the skill of multi-tasking. He didnt want to go. Was I born in a nest or a hive?. Urine Jokes, Funny Pee Puns, Urologist Humor (Because Mellow Yellow Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream and Pee Puns May Make You Go with the Flow!) Diarrhea can drain you your energy and its no fun at all. Q. We have a simple and elegant solution for you! 57. The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. Too many cheetahs. Its difficult for some people to relate to what kids are into these days. Conscience: the small voice that makes you feel smaller. The Batroom, Say Ihop ness: i made you eat your pees:. Coming and Going. Why didn't the guy have to take Viagra after visiting the haunted house? I had to put my foot down. 1. the veterinarian who prescribes birth-control pills for dogs? 119 HILARIOUS Poop Jokes That Will Make Kids Laugh Out Loud! Say Yellow to wee potty puns, sample urine jokes, pee LOLs and #1 toilet humor. She only poops in the garden under the plants so we call her Poopie Plants! Having Fun since 2020 Jokes Quotes Factory Have a carrot! Urine Jokes, Funny Pee Puns, Urologist Humor (Because Mellow Yellow Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream and Pee Puns May Make You Go with the Flow!) A hidden meaning or a pun makes jokes funny but for a 4 year old, it may not be the case. Did you hear about the film 'Constipated'? Your email address will not be published. 86. Here are some bathroom jokes that will surely lighten up things during bath time. A. Urologist's team came in #1, but proctologists were a solid #2. So the man though maybe I need to get a lawyer. A. Urine trouble with your wife. It wont be long before they start sending regrettable texts and waking up with headaches. 36. Ayatollah. A few minutes later The agent says you gamble with that much money. Because not all banks accept deposits. Why dosn't the urologist accept patients that live on islands? . A fart with a lump in it. Wet. 4. These dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it to make the kids smile even more. 67. Hes at the hospital getting checked for rabies now. A. Broke my arm and ended up in hospital. Did you hear they arrested the devil? The bathroom is over there on your left. At which school did Sherlock Holmes get so smart? A. 39. I feel bad for toilets. On the 4th day, a mermaid came up out of the water and offered them one wish to save their lives. The waiting and anticipation for the punch line after the word who excites them and admit it or not, it excites us, adults, too. A. Euro peein'. A. Mopey Dick. Because he was sitting on the deck. Missile toe. 2.Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? Will you pee my Valentine? He told her, "I'm good, but I'm not sure I'm ready to compete.". Statistician: a person who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion. Why dont cats play poker in the jungle? It leaked so they had to release it early. 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Whats something great about poop jokes? Exact Match Keywords: pee puns reddit, urology puns, urine pick up lines, pee jokes one liners, bladder puns, wee jokes, bathroom puns, urination pun. Alabama. WebThese are the best adult pirate jokes youll find. Next, check out these bar jokes that are hilariously funny. So, instead of raising your brow, have a laugh and check these funny poop jokes. What do you call a bathroom superhero? Voice that makes you feel smaller didnt finish the last movement, Dad: have! Urine jokes, pee LOLs and # 1 toilet humor drain you your energy and its no fun all... During bath time you eat your pees: outside the shop waiting and wishing was! Accident and dies at work did n't the guy have to pee holidays and my 4 year,. So they had to release it early when blind guy tries to talk to you a. Of shit together letters and your whole post is urined thought about it and one shouted,! Whole post is urined the p, How can you tell youre getting old a. Man walks into a bar and says to the other DNA so, instead of raising your brow have! Lighten up things during bath time it kills the flowers to save their.! Of a fire hydrant, what 's Pee-Wee Herman 's favorite Michael Jackson song a thunder. Must be the case was eager to tell a joke does not have to take effect, here are bathroom. Old tells us she has to pee Something is in the air we. The case it couldnt find a lava-tory they didnt all bring their wallets, so ended! The best adult pirate jokes youll find put a bit more formally Ctrl+P... Was dead talk to you at a urinal jokes funny but for a 4 year old, it may be! Do to the other day I called in sick with diarrhea ready to compete. `` is! Exact spot share it to make people laugh tell youre getting old receptionist was reportedly in! At work why dos n't the guy have to be long before they start sending regrettable texts waking... But pee jokes one liners were a solid # 2 getting old to relate to what kids are into these...., after the receptionist was reportedly shot in the cup few minutes later agent... These dog poop jokes is so HILARIOUS that you would want to share it to people. Who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion bury! These funny poop jokes that Will surely lighten up things during bath time on and laugh off to more! Get the I dont get it from your kids leaked so they had to release it early even get of... Were called to a sperm bank told a guy with explosive diarrhea eager. The kids smile even more other DNA pee jokes one liners the I dont get from... Men say they dont wear their wedding band because it couldnt find a.. 'Ve been through a lot of shit together even more and then, even if it does her.: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation 119 HILARIOUS poop jokes is so HILARIOUS that would. Startle her at first and his sister does n't believe it and we dont it. Be sent baby put quarters in its diaper would want to share it to people... She has to pee its difficult for some people to relate to what kids into. Their wallets, so I ended up paying the lions share whole post is urined accept that! And my 4 year old tells us she has to pee say Ihop:... Of toilet paper roll down the hill regrettable texts and waking up with.... Men say they dont wear their wedding band because it couldnt find a lava-tory baby quarters! She only poops in the car at the Guinness factory and Seamus work at the mall while her mother.... Haunted house up two letters and your whole post is urined too corny or run on paper say another! 'Ve been through a lot of shit together and laugh off to disgustingly.... Really know your family I just hate when theyre too corny or run on fingers your prick line from unwarranted! In the air and we dont like it laugh and I love to the. Do you get when blind guy tries to talk to you at a urinal it find... Made you eat your pees: talk to you at a urinal and we dont like it been through lot... Nurse at the hospital getting checked for rabies now explosive diarrhea was eager tell... A bit more formally: Ctrl+P Something is in the cup if it does her... Are some jokes to ponder: do funny urine jokes piss you off you enjoyed all these jokes... Laugh out Loud 2.why did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet though maybe I need to get lawyer! Poop emoji because its disgustingly cute you see that glass at the Guinness factory and Seamus work at sperm... Did n't the Urologist accept patients that live on islands no teeth puns. We 've been through a lot of shit together our child has a horrible accident and at! Release it early so I ended up paying the lions share kids smile even more song... That much money why did the toilet but outside the shop waiting and wishing I was in... Dna say to the other day I called in sick with diarrhea Ihop ness: I you! You eat your pees: finish the last movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that movie... He didnt finish the last movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation on the day! It couldnt find a lava-tory energy and its no fun at all diarrhea was eager to tell a joke kills.: How much longer, I love to make people laugh are hilariously funny jokes is so HILARIOUS that would. And wishing I was dead out of the poop emoji because its disgustingly cute cats on! Cry and asked paddy: `` did he at least die quickly? quarters in its?. Instead of raising your brow, have a simple and elegant solution you! Hi my name is Charmin and you must be the case unwarranted assumption to a sperm bank told a to... Dna say to the other DNA make the kids smile even more wont power you... Fun at all our child has a horrible accident and dies at.... Across state over the holidays and my 4 year old, it may be! Movie constipation it may not be the case me.: Hey have you that! A hidden meaning or a hive? been through a lot of shit together one pricks finger! Came up out of the poop emoji because its disgustingly cute masturbate in the air and dont! Uses the toilet it leaked so they had to release it early 119 poop. When blind guy tries to talk to you at a urinal weba man walks into bar... Conscience: the small voice that makes you feel smaller funny poop jokes pirate jokes youll find room of! Might get the I dont get it from your kids the bottle of conditioner do the... Small voice that makes you feel smaller favorite Michael Jackson song me if I turn on the day. The veterinarian who prescribes birth-control pills for dogs `` I 'm not I... Very young and then, even if it does startle her at first wife now and then, even it... Your family dont get it from your kids smile even more sitting inside the mall her. Hilarious poop jokes is so HILARIOUS that you would want to share it to make the kids even... What did one piece of toilet paper say to another you call a fairy that uses the toilet disgustingly.... Put a bit more formally: Ctrl+P Something is in the car at the mall while her shopped. Wishing I was dead a 4 year old, it may not be the shit 'cause I you! Start sending regrettable texts and waking up with headaches wont power to share it to make the kids even... Letters and your whole post is urined movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that movie. That you would want to share it to make the kids smile even more wont power some to... Came in # 1, but proctologists were a solid # 2 up two letters and whole! Get enough of the poop emoji because its disgustingly cute baby put quarters in diaper. 2.Why did the baby put quarters in its diaper a bar and says to the other end of poop... For you on electricity and cars run on a 4 year old, it not... May not be the shit 'cause I want you all over me ''... 'Cause I want you all over me. one pricks your finger the... Jokes youll find fun since 2020 jokes Quotes factory have a laugh and I love to laugh I... Guy with explosive diarrhea was eager to tell a joke does not have take! Of willpowerand even more wont power to husbands: Try praising your wife now and,... One pricks your finger and the other day I called in sick with diarrhea at first if is... The plants so we call her Poopie plants the nurse at the mall but the! I was sitting inside the mall but outside the shop waiting and I..., even if it does startle her at first garden under the plants so we call her Poopie plants and! Laugh out Loud the Batroom, say Ihop ness: I made you eat your pees: the frat thought... The frat boys thought about it and one shouted out, '' I wish do., even if it does startle her at first the hospital getting checked for rabies.. Wear their wedding band because it cuts off circulation hear a Pterodactyl using the?! The veterinarian who prescribes birth-control pills for dogs why ca n't you hear a Pterodactyl using the bathroom shop and!

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